January 2026

Alphonse Lichtenberg III wins an epic game of Root by a sneaky misdirection amid bird-y turmoil.

Alphonse Lichtenberg III once again took the role as head of the Eyrie Dynasty. Crabapple Westlake took the reins for the entrenched powers of the Marquise. While Charlie Dash acted as rouser-in-chief for the Woodland Alliance rabble.

The early game saw Commander Westlake try to contain the Eyrie to the southeast corner. The gambit failed and the Eyrie quickly built roosts throughout the middle of the map. This ambitious expansion turned out to be an overreach. Not long after the roosts were built, the despot in charge was overthrown and the government of the Eyrie was sent into turmoil. The turmoil led to the Eyrie adjusting their goals to only ruling the clearings they considered worthy of their rule thus ignoring any penalties from government in turmoil. “Let the rest of the forest rot for all I care”, the new leader preached.

After nearly an hour there had still been almost no fighting. The Marquise’s policy of: “just want a nice time conquering the lands that used to belong to the birds and are now inhabited by the critters of The Alliance.” but it was another ruse! The Marquise began unleashing her forces repeatedly on the assembling birds as she tried to secure more territory for her wood mills. Her field hospitals ready to treat wounded soldiers that returned from the battles.

In the background, a quiet resistance was building. The constant saber rattling and marching of troops through otherwise peaceful lands was disturbing the locals and Charlie Dash started to organize a resistance. OUTRAGE! was their cry. And spreading the resistance was their objective. Soon enough they built sympathy in 8 of the clearings and supporters were plenty.

Victory seemed out of reach for any of the groups until the Marquise announced that instead she would instead of absolute power she would chase the dream of controlling the key corners of trade for the forest. And quickly, the Marquise held all four of the corners while needing only two. The birds and the critters scrambled to foil her victory but they were all of them deceived. For another victory was had. With a monotone and emotionless “and I win”, Aplhone Lichtenberg III announced her victory to a stunned table. And, sure enough, she had quietly recaptured the historic clearings of the Eyrie. She had set the felines and the upstart Alliance against one another and deceived both. The Woodland Alliance were too slow to catch on and the industrious felines of the Marquise ran out of literal steam. I for one welcome our new bird overlords. A Owl?! A Owl. Mr. Wise!

An El Salvadorian coffee and some ginger tea was the drink of choice for the aspiring woodland rulers while ginger cookies filled their bellies.